I was going to write a clever description, but no.
American Airlines’ number (1-800-433-7300) is only one number away from a SEX HOTLINE (1-800-633-7300) IM NOT FUCKING KIDDING MY FLIGHT GOT CANCELED SO I HAD TO CALL AMERICAN AIRLINES AND THE LADY WROTE IT SO THE 4 LOOKED LIKE A 6 SO I CALLED IT AND THIS LADY JUST GOES ”MMMMM IVE BEEN WAITING FOR YOU IM SO HORNY” IM LIKE IM SHIT THIS ISN’T AMERICAN AIRLINES FUCK
look me in the eye and tell me that none of the initials in “ITT Technical Institute” already stand for “technical” or “institute”
"I have read the Terms and Conditions"
id hit up barnes and noble during the purge
when I was like 9 my neighbors asked me to watch their fish and cat while they went on vacation and I was like “lol k” and while they were gone tHE FUCKING FISH DIED so when they got home I apologized to the mom and she was just like “no need to apologize, I turned the filter off so they would die because they are too much work. You did nothing wrong” and she gave me 20 bucks and that is the story of my first contracted murder
ALRIGHT SO IT’S 2:30 IN THE MORNING AND I WAS JUST ABOUT TO FALL ASLEEP AND THEN I SAT UP AND ALMOST SCREAMED BECAUSE I WAS STRUCK WITH REALIZATION AND I DISCOVERED THE ULTIMATE TRUTH OF THE UNIVERSE
TELETUBBIES ARE CALLED TELETUBBIES BECAUSE THEY HAVE TELEVISIONS IN THEIR STOMACHS
a fun way to start the day is by getting a call from a robot pretending to be a human
The video for the gif that’s been going around all day.
tHE GUY HOLDING THE CAMERA HIS FUCKIGN LAUGH AND THEN HEFALLS THE FUCK DOWN OH MY GOD JESUS DICKS IM FRICKGIN
Lavoisier is having none of your shit.
Heeeey so fun fact: the woman in that painting is Lavoisier’s wife, Marie-Anne Pierrette Paulze, who not only acted as Lavoisier’s lab assistant but also translated English and Latin texts into French so he could read them. But she didn’t just translate, she pointed out errors in the chemistry in some of the texts. Her observations of these errors convinced Lavoisier to study combustion, which led to his discovery of oxygen. She was also critical to the publication of Lavoisier’s Elementary Treatise on Chemistry in 1789. She kept strict records of every experiment they conducted together and drew detailed diagrams of all their equipment. She also threw amazing parties and invited all the brightest minds in science so her husband could pick their brains. After Lavoisier was guillotined she secured all of his notebooks and equipment for posterity.
In short: NOBODY KICKS MADAME LAVOISIER OUT OF THE LAB.
Also, a side note: My historian husband-to-be pointed some things out to me about this painting. Notice that Madame Lavoisier is looking at the viewer, and all the light is on her, while Lavoisier himself is physically smaller than her, in shadow, and looking up to her in reverence. This isn’t a candid photograph- all of these choices are deliberate. The painting isn’t of Lavoisier- Madame Lavoisier is meant to be the central subject.
I can just imagine Lavoisier telling all his colleagues that his wife is really the one with all the clever ideas, and them patting him on the back and telling him he’s sweet for saying so.
I LOVE IT
It’s actually a good thing that the zombie apocalypse starts in Florida because then the zombies only have one way to go and that’s straight up into trigger happy redneck territory. I give it two weeks before monster trucks and mullets save us.
can we talk about how this is still getting notes
The funny thing is that i can not actually come up with a counter argument for this.
So I was taking a photo of my friend Aaron at the beach today when this happened.
*does the cup song with the goblet of fire*
Tom Hiddleston as the other Holmes brother - variation 2
yes. thats good. really. i can deal with it